You were the first heart I ever fell into,
before my children, before I even knew what love could be.
I was a young leaf in the shade of your tree,
following your every step,
wanting to be at yours, with you, always.
You were the keeper of songs and stories,
a river flowing with folklore,
teaching me the words that shaped my tongue
to speak Somali like an Ayeeyo too.
How can I eat *muufo and compare it to yours again,
knowing I’ll never have it the same?
Little things you’ve never known,
the hue of your melanin made me whole.
Someone so important in our family and community,
a voice of authority who looked like me,
healing parts of me you’ll never know.
I miss brushing your silky black hair,
the mole in the middle of your scalp,
little details that made you, you.
I don’t make sense of a world without you;
my mum has lost her mum, yet I am falling apart.
I hate that I missed so many cuddles and kisses,
but I am grateful I saw you,
and whispered my goodbyes.
You were the sun that held this family together,
the glue in the cracks, the spark in every room.
You got to witness three generations of women
descending from you,
and I hope you knew, truly felt,
how much we love you.
I fear the shadow now that follows your absence;
nothing will ever feel the same, that is true.
This big loss is teaching me,
showing me that adulting comes with heavy truths,
and that life will ask me to lose more,
to face more pieces of my heart gone before their time.
I have lost a part of my soul,
yet I am blessed beyond measure
to have walked in the light of your love,
to have learned from your hands, your words, your heart.
It hurts in ways that make the chest ache and the eyes burn.
May Allah forgive you,
wrap your grave in gardens of light,
and grant you *Jannah tul Firdaws, serene as a dawn.
May He grant us *sabr,
holding us steady like the roots of a tree,
until we meet again where love has no end,
and goodbyes dissolve into eternity.
Muufo- Somali maize flat bread, eaten with stew or alone with tea.
Jannah Tul Firdaws- The garden of Paradise and the highest of the 7 heavens.
Sabr- patience/perseverance but also combines with restraint and acceptance
ayeeyo/oma- grandma in Somali and Dutch
This was such a beautiful tribute to ayeeyo 🙏🤍
I’m so sorry for your loss, sis. I can feel how deeply she meant to you, and I pray your heart finds peace in the memories you shared. May you be reunited with her in heaven one day 🌹